Lord of the Spies
by chaikai
Summary: Isolated from the outside world and betrayed by ones once called friends, both RED and BLU find the odds of survival is stacked against them. But an uneasy alliance quickly devolves into chaos as new sides are established and lines are crossed.


Day 366

Two figures danced around the large bonfire. They jumped and yelled and laughed, their voices hoarse and cracking. The fire elongated the shadows that mirrored their movements. The flames licked at the pole in the middle of the fire, atop it a hunk of rancid meat sat with wide, unblinking eyes crawling with flies. There was a gunshot and one of the figures fell, unmoving in the light.

* * *

Day 1

The wheels of the old camper van churned up dust as it barreled down the empty desert road. The early morning sun was still rising, illuminating the few clouds that still lay in the sky. In the back, he could hear the choppy bits of a conversation. Even farther away he could hear the old engine of the truck that followed them.

Sniper turned sharply onto an unnamed dirt road, the sudden action eliciting a few bumps and swears from the rear. "Yo Snipes!" An angry sounding Bostonian voice yelled. "You tryin' t' kill us or somethin'?" The remarks fell onto deaf ears as the Sniper desperately hoped that neither of them had broken any of his possessions.

Ahead of them, an armadillo was making its way slowly across the road. Sniper was considering slowing down for the creature when Spy's sleek black two-seater car, which in reality could only seat one person comfortably, sped past him and hit the animal dead on, sending its bloodied carcass flying. Muttering something under his breath, Sniper watched as Spy's car sped into the distance, its tinted windows giving no view of the man inside.

In the back, Scout sat back down on the counter in Snipers minuscule excuse for a kitchen and rubbed a newly forming bump on his head. "Moth'a fuckin'- Does he even have a license?" The Pyro simply shrugged from his spot on the Snipers bed. "I swear t' God," Scout continued, undeterred by the fire starters silence. "Don't care whaddah gotta do, I'll lick the mans cowboy boots if I gotta, but next time I'm riddin' with Engineer."

Pyro turned his head and peered out the small rectangular window of the van. The flat, barren landscape had given way to the still barren mountains of red rock. "Mrrm wrrh hrrr yhh?" The Scout paused for a moment to decipher his co-workers garbled question before shrugging. "Hey Sniper!" He yelled at the driver's vague location. "Hot-head wants t' know if we're there yet!" No answer. "Sniper!"

"Well if we were there, why would I still be bloody drivin' ya?" Sniper yelled back. His fingers flexed on the driving wheel. He was_ not_ driving Scout the next time.

It seemed like a miracle when they arrived on the outskirts of Dustbowl that no one had been violently strangled to death. The Spy's car was already parked in front of a pathetic pile of rocks trying to masquerade as a mountain. Sniper pulled in next to it and Engineers truck rolled in next to him. Scout practically jumped out of the camper when it stopped.

" 'S gonna be a real scorcher." Engie remarked as Sniper slid out of the van. "Hey boy!" He called as Pyro waddled out behind Scout. "Make sure you don't go an' pass out on us today!" Pyro yelled something back, the meaning lost to the two men.

Odd looking trees dotted the no-man's-land area between the mountain and the town. The odd vulture would fly above them, momentarily circling what it recognized as a soon to be meal. The town itself was eerily quiet, like the calm before a large storm. The small group purposely avoided having to cross paths with the BLU's base. The last thing any of them wanted was the jeering that would come from the locked doors and darkened windows.

* * *

"Ach! There ye lads are!" the Demoman yelled as they entered the resupply room. "Thought we were gonna have t' start without you!" The Heavy slightly nodded in acknowledgement and the Medic did a small wave before they returned to their conversation.

" Would 'a been here sooner if feather-foot over there would 'a stepped on the gas a bit!" Scout said jabbing a finger at the Sniper.

"Oi! If you're gonna insult m' drivin' maybe I should 'a jus' made you walk, ya ungrateful wanker." Sniper crossed his arms. "Speaking 'a wankers, where's the bloody spook?"

"I thought he vas in zat little caravan of yours." The Medic responded.

"All right ladies!" The Soldier yelled as he strode into the room. "Mission starts in three!"

"Don't think we can." Engineer said putting his toolbox on the floor. "Spy ain't here."

"What do you mean the crouton isn't here?"

"He should be," Said the Sniper. "We had to walk past that bloody sports car o' his to get here."

"Maybe he decided to stretch his legs a bit 'fore all hell breaks loose." Scout offered.

"And not return minute before mission?" Heavy asked doubtfully. "Is risky, even for sneaky man."

"Maybe he wandered into the tunnels the tunnels an' got lost." Demoman said cracking open a bottle of Scrumpy.

Though the mental image of the Spy bumping around in the rank darkness of the tunnels did cause a few stifled snickers, a feeling of uneasiness was beginning to settle over the group.

"What happens if he doesn't show?" Scout asked.

The mercenaries were silent. All these years they had worked at RED and none of them had ever been absent... they never had a reason to.

"Vell," The Medic readjusted his glasses. "It vould definitely put us at a tactical disadvantage."

The Soldier crossed his arms, a growl sounding in the back of his throat. "If that French bastard doesn't show his masked mug in the next 30 seconds I am shoving that goddamn knife of his down his throat."

Thirty seconds passed. Then thirty more. Then a minute. Then thirty minutes. Soon an entire hour had passed with no Spy and no mission start.

The Sniper rubbed his temples, the steady metallic beat of Soldiers shovel banging against the supply closet slowly giving him a migraine. Something told him this was going to be a very long day.

* * *

(BLU BASE)

It was horrible. Unbearably cruel, really. And it would be something that he would hold as a grudge against that woman for a long, long time. Being forced to sit in that stuffy waiting roomed for the damned was one thing. Being forced to talk to his teammates while they were conscious for extended periods of time was one thing. But being forced to sit in the Resupply Room for two hours while Scout essentially went over every waking moment of his irritating existence was another thing entirely, and the Medic would never forgive the Announcer for making them wait this long.

By this time, some of the others had wondered off into the base, seemingly convinced that the fight had been canceled or that an agreement had finally been made in this senseless war, though Medic highly doubted the latter option. The Heavy had gone off in a quest for food, Engineer and Pyro had just left, the Demoman following shortly after running out of alcohol, and the Spy had never shown up for the day. Now, only he, Scout, Soldier, and Sniper were left in the suffocating white room. Medic had just sat down on one of the uncomfortable wooden benches after the clock ticked one hour past their start time, and Scout had just plopped down next to him, still talking. Soldier stood still a statue, his back barely touching the resupply cabinet. Sniper, unlike the others, was sitting cross legged on the ground cradling his rifle close to him and resting against the wall. Though his eyes were hidden behind his shades, Medic swore the man was sleeping.

As the Scout went on, the Medic removed his glasses, slowly rubbing his eyes, and then got up and left the room without a word, even as Scout called after him. The door slid shut behind him and the Medic sighed in the newfound silence. If he didn't know any better he'd have sworn his ears were ringing after having to listen to the Scouts voice for so long. He started off through the long, dusty halls of the base, though he supposed it wasn't really dust, it was dirt. Everything in the Dustbowl base was always covered in a thin layer of dirt, their clothes, their guns, _everything_. Even their food tasted like dirt most days. It was disgusting.

The Medics boots kicked up small clouds of dirt as he walked. Hallway through hallway, door through door, not really to anywhere in particular, and somehow he ended up playing Go-Fish with Pyro and Engineer in what was supposed to be the Engineers lab in a comfortable semi-silence . Medic couldn't help but grin at the fact that two men of science were getting beaten in a simple game of cards with a masked man-child... or woman-child... Who knew, really? It's not like Medic had ever been authorized to give Pyro a checkup. But it's not as if that fact was eating him up inside... much.

Two hours later their comfortable semi-silence had turned into a nervous quiet, and out of the three of them, it was Engineer who first voiced his worry.

"Five hours," He said. "We were supposed to start fightin' five hours ago."

If not for the quiver in his voice, the remark would have come off as quite nonchalant.

"It appears so." Medic replied picking up a card.

"Wonder what happened."

"Vhat do you think happened?"

"I don't know." He said shortly.

"Ja, Ja, don't get snappy just because-"

The metal door clanged open behind them. Muttering foul words under his breath the Soldier stalked into the room.

"What's the matter, hoss?" Engineer asked, his usual grin back on his face. "Get tired of waitin'?"

Soldier simply sat down in an empty chair beside Medic and let out a long, over-dramatic sigh.

"Couldn't handle that kid yapping my ear off much longer. Deal me in Engie."

"Sure thing." Engineer said, collecting the cards from the other two players.

"We were actually just havin' a conversation 'bout this whole thing." Engie said as he shuffled. "Ya wouldn't happen to know what's goin' on, do ya?"

"Of course not." Soldier replied gruffly. "If I did, this mess would already be fixed."

"Fixed?" The Engineer asked as he delt.

"Well yeah, isn't it obvious? This is all to do with some mess going on on the Announcers side."

"Ya think?"

"Absolutely! What other explanation is there?"

"Well, I heard some 'a the guys sayin' that we may have reached a truce with RED. Got any threes, buddy?"

Pyro shook their head and the Soldier scoffed.

"A truce? With **RED**? Ridiculous!"

"Smmrdm, nmm Jmmks?" Pyro interrupted.

"Try again, mumbles. As I was saying, Ridiculous! Those RED dogs would never be satisfied with a truce. They're blood thirsty animals!"

"Aw, come on Solly. They may be bad, but they're just people."

"Vell people or not, and I can _not_ believe I am about to say these vords, I think Soldier is correct." Medic said. "I don't think either side would just accept a truce. Engineer, threes?"

"Sorry Doc, Go Fish." The Engineer sighed. "Yeah, I suppose you two're right. But then this situation makes even less sense."

"Don't think about it too much, Engie. It's probably just a malfunction."

"Maybe."

A sudden look of displeasure appeared on the Soldiers face, and without another word he took his gun from his side and shot the Medic pointblank in the head.

Engineer jumped to his feet. "**WHAT IN THE SAM HECK ARE YOU DOING?**"

"Caught the Nazi bastard peaking at my cards." Soldier said, as if that made everything alright.

Pyro picked a card up from the center of the table as if totally oblivious to the dead man now partially slumped onto them, save for the single act of patting him on the head as if he were only sleeping.

Soldier stood up, putting the gun back in its clip.

"When the Doc gets back, come get me so we can finish the game."

Engineer slowly sank back into his seat and removed his goggles to rub his eyes. Something told him this was going to be a very long day.

The Medic didn't respawn.

* * *

**Authors Note: Hey guys, so a little warning about this. This first chapter was written I think over a year ago, and I found it while cleaning out my computer. So, while I do remember where I was headed with this, it is unlikely I'll write any more. Thanks for reading though!**


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